I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
