I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
