even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
