Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
It's blow job season.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
