one might say we're banned from that church
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
