Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Randomize