Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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