Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
