Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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