I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize