Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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