Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
