Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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