its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Randomize
