she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I would fuck him just for his dog
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