the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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