She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
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