there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
