your room smells of hookers.
And success
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
