thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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