At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
