their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Redeem this text for a blowjob
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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