I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
