i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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