sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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