girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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