Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
