You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize