we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
