White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
