After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
