But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
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