Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize