i just google imaged poop.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize