Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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