that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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