you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize