i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
