Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You have to summon your inner elephant
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
