I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
