I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
he's gonorrhea incarnate
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
