you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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