Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
