i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Randomize
