I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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