best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
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