On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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