apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
