Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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