Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
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