see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
