she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize