i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
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